“The Path,” a book of introduction to Chinese philosophy,
has an interesting approach to how we can subtly alter our relationship to happiness.
Consider the observation: “I’m sorry, but that’s not the way
I am, I can’t [do, feel good about] that.”
Normally we think of this aspect of our personality in a
clear-cut way, ie, a moral regard for those less fortunate than us, say, or
more trivially, favoring dogs over cats, not taking sugar in your coffee.
Change, though, as “The Path” asserts infects from the small
cuts.
A man barges ahead of you at the open doorway of a subway
car from which you are preparing to leave. Courtesy has it that those quitting a public
space should be afforded the room to exit before the person accepts the
privilege of riding.
What is your response? Judgment and anger at the social code
breaker? Or a smile and a shrug? How does this ritual play out within you? An
added stressor to your workday commute? Or as something that you concede as
simply beyond your control?
When it comes to wee rituals, that moment of judgment is key.
“The Path” would have us be aware of the judgment and where it takes you. Maybe
the next time your judgment is equally harsh, but you stop short of anger. In
that way, your daily rituals alter. Bit by bit.
I am on a four-mile run [on Jan. 12] when I overhear a woman
say, and “those other apartments, they will be geared to lower incomes.”
I admit my first response to hearing that was to reflect on
my superiority to those with “lower incomes.” Instead, of just neutrally
absorbing the information. Change happens in the smallest cuts.
Teachers, as I
wrote about last post, in New York City are those of lower incomes, as are beloved
nannies, retired people on fixed incomes.
Mental spaces are places of daily ritual – it is not a
phrase restricted to teeth-brushing, and dog-walking, etc. Or so says, “The
Path.” That the way you are is, believe it or not, subject to change.
Next: Running for Your
Life: Wanted: New Ideas
